My Birthday Wish - A Red December at Soul Fixins in NYC

“We are all manufacturers. Making good, making trouble, or making excuses.” – H. V. Adolt

Is it just me or do birthday wish lists get more practical as we get older? I think children tend to ask for two types of gifts – things they think they want and things they need but can’t buy because they are too young to drive a car, earn income and/or actually make purchases at some stores. More often than not, the items a child requests will be something fun. On the other hand, adults tend to request gifts that might not have bells and whistles; everyday things we could easily get ourselves.

Just the other day, when my mom asked what I wanted for my birthday, I said “ink.” Not tickets to an NBA game. Not a Spa manicure. Not even a birthday cake (I’m actually doing donuts this year in lieu of cake. That’s another story). Ink for my printer would do just fine since I keep running to the library, office supply store and nearby University every time I need to print documents. At 11-45 cents per page, that isn’t much but adds up eventually. Alternatively, I’d settle for a colander to wash my salads and pastas, light bulbs, a new trash can, or a manual can opener since the one I had broke a few months ago.

One of my favorite childhood photos. I don't know how old I was here tho.Although I’m aware that I can get these things myself – I’ve forgotten to pick them up when I’m out and about, on more occasions than I dare to count. Other times, I just don’t have the extra $7 or however much it costs to get these things when it comes down to choosing between household items and food, transportation or heat. Oh the joys of being a grown up, right?!

There still is an upside to having a practical wish list – even when it doesn’t sound very fun, especially if you’re like me and rarely know what to say when someone asks you what you want for your birthday. It’s much easier to just name something that’s already on your neglected shopping list of random items that can be had at the local grocery, pharmacy or home improvement store.

When all is said and done, I could still wait another month or so for printer ink but our friends, family, neighbors and servicemen in the U.S. Military who lose nearly everything they have to home fires shouldn’t be left waiting for shelter, warm blankets, food or toiletries such as soap, toothpaste, hair combs and other necessities to help them rebuild after a disaster. These things are provided immediately, thanks to the emergency relief efforts of the Red Cross. That is why my ULTIMATE wish for my birthday is to unite a minimum of one dozen people who will buy raffle tickets between now and my birthday celebration at Soul Fixins restaurant in New York City this Friday, December 12^th, for a chance to win one of five DVD movie gift baskets.

As a winter baby who grew into an adult wanting simple gifts in life, I am pledging my birthday to the American Red Cross in a weeklong celebration that lands at Soul Fixins, welcoming those who care about fire safety to join me for a day of movie gift set raffles, southern cuisine and music, to save lives.

How do YOU usually celebrate your birthday?

Are there any fun or interesting facts about YOUR birthday?

*The Monday Movie Meme will return next week. 

4 Types of Handmade Soap in the Movie Themed Gift Baskets I’m Raffling for the Red Cross

Proceeds from my raffle featuring the "Girl’s Night Movie Gift Bag" benefit the disaster relief efforts of the American Red Cross.The cast and crew members who worked on the short military homecoming drama “Abyss: The Greatest Proposal Ever” used a lot of soap while filming this movie.

At various points during the production, you could’ve found any one of us lathering up to remove makeup, germs and blood from our skin before shooting the next scene or wrapping for the shoot.

Given that this was just another day at the office per se, we didn’t think twice about using a regular ol’ drugstore brand. Or at the very least, I didn’t. My approach to choosing soap, however, took a different route when the time for making DVD gift baskets for my dinner-and-a-movie style Red Cross fundraiser came around.

I wanted to create a movie night experience that allows the winning recipients to entertain and pamper themselves this holiday season. Nearly all of these DVD gift sets include one bar of handmade soap that is produced in the USA. The bars are available at Soap Hope, a Dallas, Texas-based company that carries natural, wholesome and eco-friendly body care and household products. I buy from this store because I like their practice of doing business in a way that gives back to communities near and far.

According to Soap Hope, 100% of profits they make from every purchase are invested into microloans that empower women around the world to uplift communities from poverty. The recipients of these microloans return the funds interest-free within one year after obtaining the skills and resources they need to become self-sufficient. It is a business built on the idea that when you shop at Soap Hope, you change the world.

A family of four is in the care of the Red Cross following a devastating fire. / via @telesaraKnowing that my purchase helps a business make it possible for women to end poverty, in communities where sustainable solutions for capital and other basic resources are needed most, makes it all the more worthwhile.

It’s like putting the icing on the cake because this very purchase also helps me give back to the Red Cross so they can continue meeting the immediate needs of men, women and children who are rebuilding their lives after losing their shelter and belongings to home fires. In the end, those who win the gift baskets get to reap the benefits of bathing with organic bath and body products containing ingredients such as shea butter, olive oil, goat’s milk and coconut oil. It’s a win-win for everyone involved, all for the goal of trying to make the world a better, safer and more resilient place.

The LEAP Organics Lemongrass, Orange and Lime soap bar is available at www.soaphope.comCreated around themes involving the special limited edition DVD of my short film about a U.S. Army Sergeant whose homecoming plans are, the Movie Lover’s Emergency Go Bag includes one bar of French Green clay soap; The U.S. Army “Night at the Movies” Care Package comes with a Lavender, Clove and Orange soap  bar while The Girl’s Night Movie Gift Bag has one Confetti Zum Bar goat’s milk soap.

Last but not least, the Guy’s Movie Night Gift Bag sports a bar soap infused with Lemongrass, Orange and Lime – made by LEAP Organics in Boston, Massachusetts.

I’m convinced it would be hard to find a movie goer who doesn’t recognize the value that soap has in our daily lives.

Whether it comes in liquid, bar, foam, power or some other form, soap washes the remnants of butter popcorn off your fingers. This cleansing item helps us get ready for a night out (or in) at the movies. While we can all agree that soap is a necessity, all soaps are not created equal. There is a time to use standard soap when performing everyday tasks, and then there’s a time to break out the good stuff on special occasions. I wish all who are supporting my film and Red Cross fundraiser the very best of luck in the movie gift set raffle because this is, indeed, one of those occasions.

What do YOU do with your soap scraps? Do you use them until there's nothing left or Do you designate them for other purposes (room freshener, etc.) or Do you just discard them?

The Challenge of Trading Art to Save Lives

“It’s really interesting because people are judging my actions but they aren’t willing to help me achieve my goal. I really don’t get that. How can you place judgment on someone and not be willing to help them? I think it’s really selfish and super controlling. But I’m stepping in the light and focusing on myself.”  - Television actress Nydia Simone on her update at UCLA

Reality is a bitch. When I set out to use my film to raise funds for the Red Cross, the initiative seemed more promising and easier than it has come to be so far. This effort has introduced me to some of the best and most supportive parts of several communities while also bringing out the naysayers of society.

The latter part is an experience that I find rather unbelievable because you’d think it makes sense to help an organization that works to ensure your safety and survival, right?! In the last few months, however, I’m finding that a lot of people who would gladly receive financial assistance or other forms of humanitarian aid from disaster relief organizations (and even expect it) are less than willing to give it. This makes for a sad world we live in where people want to take and take and take from others but too few people want to put in anything for the chance at saving lives.

I thought my Red Cross fundraising campaign would be an ideal way to give back to a good cause while also gaining an audience for the movie. However, I’ve encountered folks who question these efforts without even taking the time to request further details or look it up for themselves and find out more information about what I’m doing.

Have you ever tried talking to someone who won’t even take a minute to consider supporting a good cause because they have so many more constructive things to do -- like scroll through iPhone apps, shop for superficial goods or complain about their own, unrelated, misfortunes? You know, those kinds of people who are on the defense and ready to shoot down any chances to make a difference before these opportunities get presented to them. From the door, they’ve already decided they’re not getting involved with whatever you have going on. However, they want to make sure you hear them out loud and clear on what they think about you’re objectives. 

Five year old, Sofia clings to a new stuffed animal given to her by Red Cross volunteers after she was displaced due to wildfires. Photo by Cesar Rodriguez/American Red CrossIt’s no secret that finding support for the arts (especially indie music, film, painting, sculpture, etc.) is like finding a needle in a haystack. I didn’t imagine, however, that it would be just as hard to find support for the Red Cross. So, I wonder if this experience is providing a glimpse into the difficulties that many non-profit organizations face every day of the year, when trying to obtain funding for the programs and services they provide to our country’s citizens and abroad.

Have we really come to a point where you have to dump a bucket of ice water on top of yourself in order to get other people to care about important matters that could affect them or their loved ones?

Between DVD sales and a movie gift basket raffle, the money raised so far through my movie tour is enough to impact survivors of disasters in the following ways:

• Buy a week’s worth of groceries for two families displaced from a disaster


• Provide more than one dozen blankets to warm men, women and children who experience power outages during a winter storm


• Supply nearly two dozen comfort kits filled with toiletries such as soap, toothbrushes and shaving cream


• Connect a family to a military spouse or relative serving overseas, so they can return home during an emergency


• Cover a few nights in a hotel for people who lost their home in a disaster

This is what’s happening with my fundraiser while the negative nancies in our communities sit on their asses, being rude, narrow-minded and downright hopeless. When was the last time any of these folks provided disaster relief to more than a handful of strangers affected by a tragedy? Probably not anytime recently, if ever. That is why I understand where actress Nydia Simone is coming from when she shares her observations on people who are quick to judge others but not be willing to lift a finger to help.

Oklahoma resident Ashley Sylvester awaits her husband’s return from military service in Afghanistan while she cleans the remains of their home. After seeing a familiar face when Red Cross volunteers visited her neighborhood, Sylvester hugs her friend Harriet Wingo. Photo by Talia Frenkel/American Red CrossPay closer attention (but not too much, ‘cause any more is a waste of time) and you will likely find that those who talk crap about what someone else is doing live uneventful lives. Whatever the issue is at hand, they tend to be part of the problem, not the solution. It’s easy to shoot down the efforts of others when you don’t have anything worthwhile going on. It’s easy to judge how someone spends his or her time when you’re not actively contributing to the rest of the world.

It’s easy to remain in your own little bubble without a care for the tragedies occurring outside your door or in your backyard – that is, until you are the one who is in need of solace from a catastrophe or help from those outside your circle of friends, family and “trusted” sources.

As a human race, I know we can do better. Time will tell what comes of this Red Cross fundraiser but there have been a lot of lessons learned up to this point. It’s a whole new world when the ideas I have in my head about what can be accomplished with the projects I’m involved in turn out looking much different in action. Still, I’m going to do what I can because, as famed rocker Lenny Kravitz once said, it ain’t over ‘til it’s over.